It's an incredible thing to witness, as the humble observer, the unfolding of such a journey. The opening and closing and inevitable opening again... The continuous spiral on which we live where we move away from, then come back to, the singular point and source of our being.
Another set-back, with my (second) instagram account being deleted sent me into a space of unknown. I have been here many times, for many different reasons, yet, it never ceases to completely annihilate me, strip me of all I thought I was, burning away in the fire of truth anything that is not the absolute bones, the core of my being.
What a beautiful gift.
Being able to allow things to die and fall away is understanding the nature of life, the life of nature... Trusting that in the ashes of your past will resurrect you, a letting go of the stories but holding on to the morals which shape you and sing you up into the most authentic version of yourself.
It's scary while you're swimming in that place of unknown, like a dark cloud of fog has descended upon your life and the road is no longer clear... Now you must listen even deeper to your heart's wisdom.
As always, I find my clarity through getting close to nature. She is and forever will be my greatest and most honest teacher, asking for nothing in return, giving everything she is.
I went for a walk with the dogs the other day and found a comfortable rock to lay back on, to stare dreamily to the heavens with the tree's luscious leaves swaying in my peripherals, gentle bird calls singing to God, reminding me of the perfection of all creation... I had my moment of clarity. What is it that I want to do with all this modelling stuff? Why do I so wish to free myself of the constraints of clothes and galavant with joy and blissful love of life around the world? Why? Because, for me, it's just another way of communicating. Communicating in a way that doesn't take you away from your heart, spinning up into your mind, but, rather, brings you back into your human body to EXPERIENCE something... Something maybe a little unique, magic, divine... For, when I rest in that place of peace, love, inner-knowing and connection, there is nothing I want more than to share that with the world. I want to intentionally imbue my work with this feeling, and hope, that it touches someone else's heart like it does mine.